Fear vs. Control
We Type A humans like to think we’re in control. Our calendars are color-coded. Our to-do lists are constantly updated. We meal prep, time block, hydrate...
But here’s the thing: control is an illusion. The world is spinning. People are unpredictable. And the universe has zero interest in your perfectly planned day.
I learned that lesson once the hard way… on live TV… in the middle of Mardi Gras.
Note: I wish I had video or even a photo of this day, but I don't. So here's a photo of me trying to be a very serious reporter covering a trial at the federal courthouse.
F-Bomb #8 - Fear of Losing Control. Control is a Lie, but Calm is Not.
I was a young reporter in Louisiana, eager to prove myself. So, of course, the newsroom sent me to cover Mardi Gras. I realized later it was a bit of a rookie test, sink or swim.
They stuck me out there at 6:00 a.m. for a Morning Show live shot on Bourbon Street. What I didn’t realize and what they knew... At 6:00 a.m., the party was still going strong. Loud. Drunk. Wild. Joyful drunk chaos.
I took the assignment seriously, prepped my segment, got ready. Did my breathing. Felt calm, cool, and professional. I sort of noticed that the seasoned live truck crew had not turned on the lights for the live shot. I just prepped in darkness, trusting they knew what they were doing. Then, at the last second, as the news anchors said "Let's Check in with Nina on Burbopn Street", they flipped the lights on… and it was like they flipped a switch on the crowd.
Suddenly I was pelted with beads, beer bottles, plastic cups and anything else the French Quarter could produce or them to throw at me. I was instantly scared.. of the 'stuff, but more so - of what to say and do. I was afraid of ruining my career before it began.. I had a matter of seconds to figure it out.
I had two choices:
Freak out.
Find my footing.
There was no way to 'control' this drunk crowd or the wasted guy gyrating behind me. I waited just long enough for the chaos to settle, looked straight into the camera, and smiled: “This is it. This is what’s happening on Bourbon Street at 6 a.m. Welcome to the party.
Not exactly polished. But it was real. And it worked.
Because in that moment, I remembered something we all forget: I couldn’t control the crowd. But I could control me.
And right now? I think our entire world feels a little like that Mardi Gras crowd - loud, unpredictable, and coming in hot.
The markets swing wildly. Industry disruptions happen overnight. Politics, global conflict, natural disasters - none of it in your hands. Layoffs. Mergers. New tech that rewrites your entire job description.
Control? Not happening. But calm? Calm is still available.
Our brains crave control because it creates the illusion of safety. But control over external chaos is a myth.
🧠 What we can control is much smaller, but way more powerful:
Our breath – It tells your nervous system: “We’re safe.”
Our presence – Fear lives in the future. Calm lives in the now.
The story we tell ourselves – That internal narrative changes everything.
Here’s a quick tip using my THIS Method: Next time the chaos hits, take one minute to ground yourself.
Timeline – Zoom out. This moment is not your whole story.
Humans – Who can help? You don’t have to do this alone.
Isolate – You are not your job, What one thing can you do right now?
Story – Rewrite the thought: “This is hard, but I can handle hard things.”
Control is a lie. But calm is a practice. A skill. A choice.
And it starts with this simple question: Where can you trade control for calm today?
You might not be dodging beads on Bourbon Street, but if you're human, you're managing noise, pressure, and unpredictability.
Take the long breath. Take the beat. Choose the calm.
You’ve got this.